Thursday 15 May 2008

Hero to Zero

Previously I've praised the Portman Group for having a sensible attitude about spurious complaints, like those made against Dorothy Goodbody's - but they have completely lost the plot over their criticism of Brew Dog's labelling.

Apparently - according to the same organisation that doesn't have enough teeth to stop the massive discounting of commodity beers in supermarkets - this fantastically funny and witty bunch of independent brewers are in breach of various areas of the code with various beer descriptors.

I'm not saying that brewers should be free to make claims that a person drinking their beer will become Superman, Don Juan and Stephen Hawking - from one sip - but using the phrase 'twisted, merciless stout' should surely be allowable?!

Frankly, if you are so stupid that you think the phrases ‘nourishing foodstuff’ and ‘magic is still there to be extracted from this drink’ implies that 'it could enhance mental or physical capabilities' you damn well deserve to have your life terminated by jumping off some very high scaffolding with your pants over your trousers, screaming 'I Believe I Can Fly' - because at least it would take you out of the gene pool or, if the injuries weren't fatal, it should at least stop you even paddling in the shallow end!